It is common to find a lot of so called ex lovers hanging around each other all in the name of friendship.
As much as I do not have issues with people remaining friends after breaking up, but I am concerned about the assumptions that may arise from such friendship.
Come to think of it, if he or she was not good enough for marriage, how come you are comfortable as friends! Is it that you both are not sure of what you want or you are afraid of the unknown.
When people see you hanging together, they presume you both are still working it out. Prospective suitors assume you are taken. Many a time, one of them end up frustrated having wasted a lot of years nurturing a worthless relationship.
Courtship is an avenue for you to learn about each other and decide if you are ready to spend the future together. If you find out he/she is not the one, please take a long walk. Don’t allow him/her convince you “we can still be friends.” That is not the time for hanging out together in the name of friendship, it is the time to go search for the real person through every right means particularly prayer and perception. The two of you can become family friends later in life when you are both settled.
Do not chase shadows. Don’t be a dog in a manger. Never allow anyone play on your emotions. I still believe in that old adage, “If you love something, let it go, if it comes back to you, it is yours, if it doesn’t, it never was yours.”
Waiting to hear your wedding bells ring.
She is the founder of Cassandra's Diary, a forum for trashing out issues in families.
Married to Dele, they are blessed with 3 children, Temi, Tolu and Alexandra.
In summary, my team and I, we are counselors and public speakers with a passion to raise model families.